Schrauben Family Singers

It’s again been a while since I posted, so I must update.  First of all, Phoebe is walking!!  Yea!  She’s 21 months old now, and has just really finally taken off in the last week -

Which we spent in Michigan.  Originally, Phil and Mary were going to go alone.  Yada yada, it worked out for all of us to, and we left Tuesday morning early for MI.  We spent a good week with family and friends, going to the lake, Ionia Free Fair (nation’s largest free fair), shopping, visiting, and even getting in on a family reunion on Phil’s grandfather Selden’s side.  We had a wonderful trip, but it’s so good to get home.

Another baby went to be with Jesus, at six weeks gestation (June 21st).  We have lost two babies in such a short time.  It can surely cause one to question what God has in mind!  But, through it all, we continue to place our trust in Him, including knowing He’s in control of our “family planning,” not us!  That is what brings peace and nothing else.  Personally, I am thankful to have finally reached a place of peace, concerning whether or not we’ll “have more babies.”  I truly am at a place of contentment with whatever He wants, whether or not we do indeed birth another child.  He knows my inmost desires, and He also knows what is best.  That’s what I want.

We will have this week at home to relax (ha) and prepare to leave again next Monday for MN.  We shall visit friends and family, but the BIG reason for the timing of this trip is the Family Bluegrass Festival at Lake Itasca (see Berge Family link).  It’s something we have wanted to do for a couple of years now (this is the third year!), and now it’s in the works.

Well, since it’s pretty much impossible to write a blog post without interruption and SOMEBODY needing me, I must write more later.  I think all five children have a pressing need right now (apparently).  Sigh.

I had no idea that time has flown so quickly.  I was again reminded of why I’ve been “gone” for so long now, when I saw my most recent post.

Our baby went to be with Jesus,  probably shortly after my OB check-up.  I had such a good report then.  But, Thursday, April 3rd, I began lightly spotting.  Which turned into more spotting on Friday.  And, by Saturday, the 5th, I knew it was over.  I won’t go into the graphic details, but when I spoke to my doctor (before my trip to the ER, because of blood loss), he said my Hcg levels were already down to 4500.  At that stage of a pregnancy (11 weeks), the levels should have been around 200,000. 

God was with us through it all.  He is ever SO faithful.  He helped me to be able to “pass” everything in mostly the one day, with really not a whole lot of physical pain.  And, my Hcg levels returned to normal by two weeks later.   So, physically, my body worked as it should have.

Emotionally, I have certainly had my ups and downs.  Phil and I have both done our share of shedding tears.  Unexpected things will trigger my weeping, too.  But, God.  Yes, He has never left my side through it all.

We wanted this baby, just as much as we’ve wanted the others.  We looked forward to growing our family again.  We anticipated what God had planned for this child, and how much our lives would change and grow because of him/her.  We DIDN’T anticipate our child being taken home before we could meet him/her!  But, our children belong to Him.  They always have, from the get-go.  And, this baby was no different.  He chose to “keep” this one, rather than allowing us to become his or her earthly parents. 

So, we don’t ask, “Why?”  Because, we don’t need to.  We have complete faith and trust in the Lord, that He knows what He’s doing.  We trust that He’ll bring continued healing to us.  We know He’s taking good care of our baby - much better than we ever could’ve, and that we’re assured to meet Baby some day!

We are thrilled to be expecting our sixth child this fall.  The EDD is October 30th, but with my track record we’ll just say November sometime.  :)  I’ve been tired and a teeny bit queasy, but I really can’t complain.

God has been so good to us.  We thank Him that He’s again allowing us to care for another soul here on earth.  We continually pray for wisdom in the raising and training of our precious blessings! 

(I’m trying to figure out how to get a Baby Ticker in my sidebar, but I’m not too clever.  I might have to recruit some help!)